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We recommend water-based lube because it is safe to use with all types of toys. Generally you don’t need to disinfect toys that only one person uses or that stay covered with condoms. Some nonporous, nonmotorized toys can go into the dishwasher without soap for steam sanitizing.

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If you have a cold sore and you give your partner oral sex, you can infect them with the herpes virus. Even shallow insertion of the penis into the vagina (sometimes called dipping) carries risks for both partners. Jordi Lippe-McGraw is a freelance writer and editor covering travel, parenting, and wellness. She’s traveled to more than 50 countries on all seven continents (including Antarctica while five months pregnant) and equally loves penguins and truffles.

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